Climate Change Humor

     Other than a few one liners from the late night talk shows, there really isn't much Climate Change humor out there. I searched the net and found a few things here and there, but its only a handful of jokes, and most just aren't that funny. I have been racking my brain, trying to come up with some, but I'm just not that funny (you can read my past columns for evidence of that). So, why am I looking for jokes about something that I keep insisting is a serious issue that has dire consequences if we fail to get our act together and stop damaging our Biosphere? Because something so serious and important HAS to have some humor in it somewhere. In order to get people to open up, we have to relieve the tension. After all, Comic Relief used comedy to raise awareness and funds for the homeless.

     If anything, humor is needed to break the ice (pardon the pun) and get people to be receptive to an idea. I could walk around for the rest of my life (or at least until my home in the foothills of the Alps 1000 meters above sea level becomes water front property) spouting alarmist doom, but I would probably be taken as seriously as the homeless guy in Times Square with the sign that reads, "The End Is Near!" It is already happening. I get labeled a climate zealot and part of the liberal conspiracy to prop up the LED lightbulb industry. Forget that I have valid points and scientific data to support what I preach. I'm an alarmist! Back away before I put solar panels on your house!

    Think about it. What would

 you think about a guy that said you had to: stop driving a gas powered car, put solar panels on your house and shed and garage and boat, invest in wind turbines, force the industries that spew carbon dioxide into the air to pay a tax, insulate your homes more efficiently and change all your lightbulbs over to LED's, and then told you that despite all of that, we still won't prevent climate change from happening? You would call that guy a loser. You would remember what a dolt he was and would ridicule him the next time someone mentioned carbon taxes.

     Now, if you had heard what Seth Meyers said at the NRDC Night of Comedy, you are probably more likely to talk about it and share with other in a more positive and causal manner. Meyers said:

     "If you love the environment...not a great election result. At this point, a giant tornado could form and just start whipping its way across America, and in that wind it could grab every single handgun in this country, and then the tornado would start firing those handguns indiscriminately upon the citizens of this great nation. But when it was over you would say to those people, 'Will you admit now, after the gun tornado, that we have a gun control issue and a climate change issue?' They would say, 'No, that all happened because you let gays get married.'"

    Now that's funny. While we laugh, we also relax a little and are more open to talking about something that could be uncomfortable. Humor breaks some of those barriers down. There may be no better way for someone like me to engage a person who doesn't take the threat of climate change seriously then to make fun of myself for driving a hybrid and smelling my own farts. Self deprecating humor alleviates the tension. Sadly, there are just aren't enough jokes and lighthearted moments when it comes to discussing the subject of Climate Change.

     I found a few others jokes and one liners. If you have any you want to share, leave them in the comments section. First prize is a T-Shirt made from hemp and the tears of blue whales.

Q: Why are environmentalists bad at poker?
A: They always avoid the flush.

Q: Why do only 85% of Americans believe that Global Warming is happening?
A: Because the other 15% work for Oil companies.

Q: How many climate skeptics does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. They think its too early to tell if the bulb needs changing.

Q: How do hybrid car owners drive?
A: With one hand on the wheel and the other patting themselves on the back.

Q: How does Senator Inhofe propose to battle Global Warming?
A: By switching from Fahrenheit to Celsius.

Q: What lies between a good recycler and a bad recycler?
A: Oregon.

Q: What do you get when you cross an environmentalist with direct action?
A: Arrested!

If you have any to share, leave them in the comments section. I'll leave you with this gem from Jay Leno:

     "According to a new UN report, the global warming outlook is much worse than originally predicted. Which is pretty bad when they originally projected that it would destroy the planet."